My thoughts.

Doing a little blog cuz i'm feeling sorry for myself and need a release. So recently i've been diagnosed with Coeliacs disease. I know it's not a huge thing but knowing in the back of my mind that i'm gonna have to watch what I eat for the rest of my life is something i'm really struggling to cope with. It seems everything gluten hidden. Which is really difficult eating because if I assume something doesn't have it in and i eat it, bam..i'm ill. Which i've discovered with pringles and sausage. Gluten food is so expensive too, in the last month i think i've spent about £80 on it. Bread, pasta, sausages..they're nice and worth it to eat properly but i'm not gonna be able to afford it soon. I can't even have small amounts. If I keep eating gluten and it's harming my body, it can cause infertility or bowel cancer, which is such a scary thought. But yeah, it's a huge amount to get my head around, i hate it.
On top of that, i've lost a few friends this year..I'd love to blame them entirely for that but sometimes it was my fault. 2010 has made me realise who my real friends are..the real friends that you know are gonna be there in 5,10,15 years time for you to count on. Ones that perhaps you'd pushed aside for one reason or another, there they are in times of trouble. The keepers. The ones you can trust with your life. Anyone else can piss off as far as i'm concerned. I'm a good person. I don't deserve to take shit from anyone thats not necessary.
Saying that, 2010 has been the best year of my life. I'm happier than i've ever been. I've met people that really have changed my life and have made me such a happy and confident person. I hope 2011 is the same!

I haven't done a blog in so long, unsure of why. Too busy maybe? Not enough to say or worried of what I'd say. I've learnt a lot the last few weeks. I've learnt who to trust, who to believe and who to wipe completely from my mind. The latter being liars. Now I understand occasionally people tell white lies or fail to tell you things. But if you ask someone something and they reel off lies only for you to find out weeks later it's bullshit, expect the silent treatment. This is my current predicament. Someone who I trusted immensely has let me down, a lot. This person was one of the few I thought would never betray me and they have done.
So is that a problem with me? or them? Have I done something that causes people to feel the need to lie to me? Maybe I'm naive and too trusting, i don't know. But the pain of having someone break your trust like this, is absolutely horrible. And quite honestly, it's put me off trusting anyone in the future.